Small Town Living

Small town life can be wonderful.  It should be community...people caring about their neighbour...meeting friends at the local fair or the grocery store.  For people who have grown up in a small town, that is what it is.  However, there is another segment of the population that lives in most small towns.  Some of us choose to leave the clutches of the big cities and move to small towns in anticipation of being part of a community, of raising our families in a clean, wholesome environment. 

We did just that.  My husband left the city and has lived in our small-town area since the mid 80’s and when we met in the mid 90’s and decided to move in together, I too made the decision to leave the city, sell my house, quit my job and all my volunteer work and move here where I had no immediate job prospects, no friends, and no volunteer work.  I met my neighbours, enjoying saying hello or sharing the occasional beer across the fence.  I got involved with volunteering in my community, canvassing for Heart and Stroke, as well as the Cancer Society.  I volunteered with other organizations as well.  And, of course, I started sending my resume around.  A visit to the local EI office gave the sad news that I could expect to earn about half of what I’d earned in the city.  Wow!  That was a shock, but cost of living is a little more reasonable up here.  Besides, I had a husband to share expenses with anyway. 

It only took 14 months to find my first job and a year and a bit later that company relocated to...yes, the city!  I once asked that boss how it was that I got the job and not his wife’s cousin’s friend’s neighbour.  He told me that it was because he was in desperate straits since his prior assistant had left with almost no notice and he really needed someone who could hit the ground running.  Since then I’ve had a couple of short term contract jobs, but mostly it’s an exercise in futility looking for work.  I have top-notch skills that are very transferable.  When I left my last position in the city (to move here), my boss offered a promotion, my own office, and more money to keep me.  The problem is that the same ‘community’ I’m so willing to embrace, doesn’t feel the same way about me.  When an interview (and there have been precious few of them) starts out, “Are you related to...” it’s pretty much guaranteed the job will go to some underqualified relative or friend of a relative of someone who works at the company.  Someone who will take two years to learn a job I already know.  Nepotism.  Companies don’t really want to hire the most qualified person, they want to hire their favourite relative or favourite employee’s relative.  Not only that, but a company in one town won’t necessarily hire someone from another town...especially when someone from their own town might need a job. 

Despite that, we’ve made friends.  Not surprisingly, these friends are mostly outsiders like ourselves.  They come from cities originally too.  While the neighbours are friendly, we can never be true ‘friends’ because my husband and I will always be those folks from the city that bought the old Smith place.  People in small towns are complacent.  They couldn’t be bothered expending the effort to actually get to know a newcomer.  Why should they?  They’ve known their friends since they were in diapers.  Perhaps they never actually learned how to make friends with a stranger.  And I’m pretty sure nobody would plan a benefit dance to help us out of any financial jam.  I volunteer in my community and participate in community events, but I know from experience that if I miss a meeting or two, there won’t be a phone call or someone dropping by to check on me.  

Our son was born here.  Maybe that will give him an "in" as he gets older.  Perhaps not.  Perhaps he will be...tainted, as it were...by having parents who are not from here.  After all, small town means small minds a lot of the time and he will ever be the son of "those people who bought the old Smith place".  On the other hand, this apartness (yes, I made up that word) may be what allows him to eventually leave this place and spread his wings in the big wide world.  I've seen so many young people around here who have no ambition to leave and in many other cases, those who go off to university or college only to return afterwards.  Time will tell.  

So while we are part of the community, we are not of the community.  Sadly, after more than a dozen years of living here personally, I fear that this will still be the case when I mark my 25^th, 40^th, or even 50^th year of living here.  

Requiem for a Rabbit

Poor Bugs.  We barely met him and he was gone. 

When my husband and son went to check on Bugs and give him more food and water, Bugs had died. 

That is sad for a number of reasons.  The person that dropped him off will never know that they condemned their former pet to death.  The coworker of my husband that was willing to take him into her home will now miss having Bugs.  My son now needs an explanation of what happened since he's only seven years old and death has not had much impact on his young life yet. 

As to what happened to Bugs, we can only speculate.  Based on my husband's observations of Bugs' behaviour, we believe he may have been stunned, either by a brush with a car or perhaps by the original tossing from a vehicle.  Either way, he was leaning to the left as he ran in circles. 

Another possibility is that Bugs simply succumbed to exposure.  After all, he was likely outside in the cold for at least two nights and days.  That's harsh for a former indoor pet. 

Either way, Bugs now rests in his cardboard coffin and will have a ceremonial burial on the weekend.  Poor bunny.  I'm so sorry that life didn't happen the way it should have for you.  Rest in peace little bunny. 

A common problem when you live in the country

I remember when I was a kid and we had this cute little white Maltese dog named "Snowball" - yeah, it was original.  Anyway, Snowball and the mailman had a real hate relationship.  The dog was your typical little barky ankle-biter and the mailman was in the wrong profession.  He was terrified of anything on four legs no matter what size.  So one day when he passed our little dog out on its line and Snowball started barking, the mailman sprayed Snowball with mace.

Some time later, my little brother was walking the dog down the street and when Snowball sighted the mailman a little ways up the block, he yanked the leash from my brother's hand, raced up the block, and bit the mailman.  (I would have bitten him too if he'd sprayed me with mace.)  So the arms of the law determined that our little dog had to go.  I'm sure it broke my dad's heart to take this beloved family pet away from three crying children, but he placated us by saying "Snowball is going to live in the country.  He'll be okay."

Now that I actually live in the country, I've come to understand what happened all those almost 40 or so years ago.

Since moving out to the lovely countryside, we've had to put down a kitten that had maggots feeding on it.  The poor thing was far too young to be away from momma kitty and was starving to death.  Our vet showed true compassion in taking it from its misery.  I agreed to bury it on our property and he only ended up charging me half the usual price for the service.

Another time we sheltered a dog in our garden shed for a couple of weeks.  She was very skittish and had obviously had a litter of puppies within the past few months.  It was in December and I put out the pillow we still had from our own dog who had passed away the previous year.  From an upstairs side window I observed "Lucky" as we'd taken to calling her actually huddling into the big pillow and resting.  She would scare off each morning as my husband left for work, but I'd use the moment to put out a dish of water and food for her.  I'd hoped to get her comfortable enough to adopt us, but one day just before Christmas, she left and never came back.

We've also experienced our share of full-grown cats coming around.  Last spring we had a friendly orange tabby hanging around.  He'd come to the deck door and although he never came inside, he would eat from my hand, and even let me pick him up.

Our most recent visitor is a most unusual one.  A couple of nights ago my husband encountered a rabbit in the driveway.  He was surprised that it didn't take off when it saw him, but carefully backed away from the rabbit and left it be.  Well, Bugs Bunny was narrowly rescued from being ripped apart by our dog and the dog belonging to my husband's best friend the next day.  The dogs - remarkably - listened when the two men shouted at them to stop.  My husband's friend scooped up Bugs and they've got him set up in the dog crate in the shop.  We're not keeping a rabbit, so Bugs needs a home.

I'm not against adopting drive-by strays.  When my son was six months old he and I went to visit my folks for Thanksgiving since my husband had to work that weekend.  As we sat in their backyard (they also lived in the country), with me having the little guy sitting on my knee, this pretty grey cat jumped into my lap and started nuzzling me, then settled down and curled up between my stomach and my son's back.

My dad told me that the cat was a stray and had been hanging around for months, living off birds and mice.  So after talking with my husband about the cat, it was decided she could come home with the little guy and me.  We lured her into the garage with a can of salmon and in the morning we taped her into a box with some air holes and put her into my car for the long trip home.  She's still with us seven years later.

I can't remember when I made the connection, but we'd been living in our current spot a few years when I asked my dad about the times our pets had "gone to live in the country".  He reluctantly admitted that he'd done just the same thing...driving to the countryside, picking a spot near water and/or water supply like a stream or pond, let the pet out and then left them behind.  I like to think that Snowball got lucky and found a family that took him in, keeping him as a loving pet for years.  The alternatives - coyotes, starvation, even cars - are too horrible to contemplate.